Early in January, I started a series called ‘The Growth Masterclass’
The series is gleaned from the book ’15 Invaluable Laws of Growth’ by John C. Maxwell and we are currently in the 5th week.
You can watch them on my YouTube channel
In one of the series, I spoke about how to build a good self-image and I figured that I should briefly share some of them in this blog post.
Self-image is the mental picture that you have of yourself that has been created by numerous self-impressions that have built up over time.
I have noticed that not everybody has a good image of themselves. Some people are walking around with a negative self-image and very low self-esteem.
In life, your self-image will determine what will happen to you as you go through life.
If that image is bad, you won’t be able to enter into the life you really want.
Life is unfair to all, you’re not the only one that has had it rough. But if you continue to carry around all your negative experiences, you will have a hard time living your best life.
In order to enter into the life God has promised you, you must learn to create a good self-image
Follow these 10 steps to help you build a good self-image:
1. Guard Your Self-Talk
Be conscious of the things that you say to yourself. Our self-talk is very important.
What you say to yourself is very powerful and will determine the course of your life.
For example, instead of saying “Why am I so stupid” when you make a mistake, why not say something like “I need to remember not to make this mistake again”
Or when something unpleasant happens to you, instead of saying “I will never figure this out” turn that into “I have to figure this out”
This is because our words crystallize perceptions that shape our beliefs, drive our behaviour, and ultimately, create our world.
Their power arises from our emotional responses when we read, speak, or hear them.
Therefore, learn to guard your self-talk by practicing what is called positive self-talk.
2. Stop Comapring Yourself with Others
We live in a world where people compare themselves with themselves and go through life using someone else’s pattern.
So many parents compare their children with other children, in terms of grade or academic excellence.
This will eat deep into the root of a child’s behaviour such that he/she will never be satisfied with who he/she is.
Even teachers tend to compare one student with another. This is so wrong.
If you are a parent or a teacher and you do this, you need to stop now.
God created us with different purposes and even though our destinies are intertwined, they are not the same.
Never think you are not doing well in life just because others seem to be doing better than you.
If you do, you will by yourself crush your self-image. Comparing yourself with others is a foolish thing to do.
For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.
2 Corinthians 10:12 KJV
3. Move Beyond Your Limiting Beliefs
There are certain beliefs that you hold true, these beliefs have been running as the software of your mind.
If you want to build a good self-image that will open you up to more in life, you need to move beyond your limiting beliefs.
Limiting beliefs, in most cases, are unconscious thoughts, which appear as defence mechanisms to avoid possible frustrations, failures and disappointments.
The first step to overcoming your beliefs is to identify them. Sit down one day and begin to question all the beliefs that you’ve held true for years, one after the other.
For instance, if you believe that you are too old to start a business for yourself or you are too old to get married again, that’s a limiting belief that will hinder you from walking into God’s plans for you.
Most of the time, our beliefs are shaped by our childhood experiences, and what our parents have passed on to us.
So to enter into a new dispensation, we must begin to move beyond them.
4. Add Value to Others
Selfishness is foolishness, you need to help other people in times of need.
And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.
Mark 12:31
Thinking about yourself all the time will get you nowhere fast, instead serve others and add value to their lives.
Look for ways to impact people’s lives, share your experience, mentor someone, go above and beyond for others.
When you start adding value to other people, you will cause them to value you more as well.
5. Do the Right Thing Always
Do the right thing even if it’s the hard thing. This helps you to build strong self-esteem and it gives you a strong sense of satisfaction.
When you do the right thing, don’t wait for commendation from other people, it doesn’t matter whether they commend you or not.
Just focus on doing things right and you’ll begin to build good character.
Every time you take action that builds your character, you become stronger mentally and emotionally.
So do the right thing even if it’s the hard thing, and do it all the time.
6. Practice Small Discipline Daily
Here are a few things you can start with
- Don’t complain about anything for a whole day
- Read a chapter of a book a day to help develop your reading habit
- Start with 10 push ups or any kind of exercise for just 10 minutes
- Make your bed
- Pray for one hour
Practice these simple disciplines daily and see your self-discipline get stronger
7. Celebrate Small Wins
Celebrating small wins is good for you, when you celebrate small wins, you’ll be able to celebrate big wins too.
Many people are so focused on the end results that they miss the chance to celebrate the little achievements on the way.
When you celebrate, you are inspired to keep going.
I have an audio CD where I spoke on Building a Strong Self-Esteem, if you’re yet to listen to it, you can download it here right now at a heavily discounted price.
If you have any questions, just put them in the comments section and I’ll answer you.